I am a woman. I was born in a period when woman emancipation and woman's rights were a given matter. I was taught that women are capable of everything they set their minds on and that we are no less than any men.
I know we aren't the same as men and I do not support extreme feminist attitudes, I believe that our differences help us living together and keep us united. But all my life, I rarely met a woman that had the character to fit in my idealized version of "girl equals power"...
I have very few girlfriends, and as i get older, I put less and less effort in making new ones...I'd rather hang out with the boys, because I can relax and forget about the constant stabbing in the back, nasty comments about non-present friends and judgmental gossiping...I feel that something is lacking in my life, and once in a while I feel like I cant trust any of the woman I know. I am told I am to demanding, I am a high maintenance friend or I expect too much of them...but why then, doesn't this happen with male friends?
Recently I found myself in an argument with a girl which isn't really my close friend and the situation escalated to the point I no longer want to hang out with her or with my group of friends that know her...I feel like I was crucified publicly by being honest with her, got a massive "Fuck You" in my face, and now I have to bear the comments of my close friends' about what she thinks happened...(coincidentally or not, a different version of mine..)
This situation, although different in context, feels like a deja vu of past girlfriends that one way or another stabbed me in the back and massively disappointed me. Although I don't want to pretend I am a victim or that I am better than anyone else, I cant help but feel sad for the fact that women just can't support each other....I know I wont for most of them....
The number of bitchy girls i have met, drastically surpasses the number of genuinely interesting, honest and even polite women I know and although in principle, I dont even feel like being their friends, I am a woman and I should keep on trying right?
There is really no conclusion for this post, but I know one thing, the few girls that I believe are worth fighting for will stab me in the back again and bitch me as usual, but I will put up with it, and I will forgive them in the end...unfortunately, there will always be a huge percentage of women that are just not worth confronting...
